\input tex
\dropcaps
\twelvepointconcreteroman
\advance\baselineskip2.5pt
\font\dc=ccr12 scaled\magstep6
\headline={\hfill\twelvepointsanserif\today}
\footline={\hfill\twelvepointsanserif\folio\hfill}

Josh --

\dropcap{H}ere's the horrorscopes. Boy are the interpretations stupid.¨
If you know someone who can interpret them better, by all means ask. I¨
cannot print out the graphic wheel yet, the software is fucked up.¨
Some of the things appear to contradict others; I think what is¨
happening is, the planetary things are supposed ``influences'' when¨
the Sun is in that sign or whatever, ie.~influences change with time¨
(that is, orbits, etc). I just make 'em, not interpret 'em. I re-did¨
yours, because between the time typo and the location error (Detroit¨
vs.~Ann Arbor) it actually changed things. It's all amusing anyways.

\dropcap{I} think I really fucked up with Teg. Larry-Bob (ran into at¨
the caf\'e) sez that textual stuff doesn't matter, but pictures do¨
(re:~bustability of sexual matter). I have to write a letter to Teg¨
today or tomorrow, sigh. Oh well, in any case he {\it does} put¨
himself out there, way hard. I suppose if I write again I might be¨
able to repair it before I become another component of his public¨
laundry-airing (I'm not so much worried about that, as I am that he'll¨
be mad at me). I tend to be paranoid about bustability, but I think¨
with reason:~I have a Federal Firearms License, I've done marginal¨
things promoting quasi-legal extremely high-tech data encryption¨
(illegal to export from the U.S., and the author was threatened with a¨
large scale lawsuit by the corp.~he stole the patented algorithm¨
from\dots), HOMOCORE, FidoNet in general (direct, unmonitored and¨
unmonitorable communications to Eastern Block countries (when that¨
mattered more) (more illegal exports)\dots

\dropcap{H}ave I told you recently how much I love you?\footnote*{A¨
lot.} I am having a hard time thinking about writing you a sexy¨
letter. OK, partly it's because it's 1:30AM and I'm tired. Partly¨
because, it's like self-torture. It rubs in the fact that I cannot¨
touch you or see you. Phone calls will drive me broke, and are barely¨
like scratching an itch -- it gets worse the more I scratch.

This will be a short letter. I can't do the sex-letter thing right¨
now. We are psychically bound. I've felt it before, and tonite (the¨
feeling that I should call you at 8PM\dots) was merely one¨
correlation. My internal energies ebb and swell, and have nothing to¨
do with what I feel for you\footnote{**}{That is, just because I'm not¨
writing you a sexy letter tonight doesn't mean my desire for you has¨
lessened.}. When I go to sleep at night, I feel incomplete without you¨
to hold. 

\dropcap{T}his letter is deteriorating into typographical fetishism.¨
I'll stop now. I hope you get that job and make tons of money real¨
fast and move to San Fagsicko in a few weeks instead of a few months¨
and Dina becomes happy for you like she should and anyways realize¨
that you being here helps her moving (OK so I can dream can't I) and¨
besides, and to change the subject, give me her complete birth info¨
(place, time, date) and if non-US, then I'll need latitude and¨
longitude reasonably exactly, and I'll make her a complete chart too.

OK, obviously my brane is deteriorating into undifferentiated mush so¨
I better stop while I'm ahead. Think of me when you jerk off, I¨
certainly do you. (Positive visualization + masturbation = your most¨
basic functional sex ritual: amazingly effective. Work out in your¨
head clear images of {\it what you want to see as reality}, literal,¨
schematic, visual, feelings, sensations, anything else, or any¨
combination, and work on them as you approach orgasm, and try to hold¨
one or a small set at orgasm. Repeat with adjustments over time.¨
External cause and effect? Creating an internal bias towards success¨
in your own head? (Training through implanting intentional memories?)¨
Who cares. {\it Be careful what you ask for, you may get it!})

It's now ten til two. I am tired. I was going to go out to Tire Beach¨
for one of the aforementioned sex ritual things, but I'll settle for¨
sleep for now. See you in my dreams\dots

\vfill
\dropcap{PS:} OK, it's Tuesday now, there were so many typos and¨
fuckups I had to edit today. It's a stupid letter. 

\bye