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Taken from Odyssey Magazine. One of the trashiest magazines in San 
Francisco.

The Twelve Extremely Gay Days of Christmas Song.


One the first day of Xmas my true love gave to me
A dildo in a pear tree

One the second day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Two hits of X and a dildo in a pear tree

On the third day of Xmas, my true love gave to me
Three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a pear tree

On the fourth day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the fith day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the sixth day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Six men a laying, five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the seventh day of Xmas My true love gave to me
Seven sacks-a-slarging six men a laying, five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the eighth day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Eight sequined cock socks, seven sacks-a-slarging six men a laying, five 
gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the ninth day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Nine boys-a-dancing eight sequined cock socks, seven sacks-a-slarging six 
men a laying, five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the tenth day of Xmas my true love gave to me

Ten butt plugs humming nine boys-a-dancing eight sequined cock socks, 
seven sacks-a-slarging six men a laying, five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the eleventh day of Xmas my true love gave to me
Eleven crystal crack pipes ten butt plugs humming nine boys-a-dancing 
eight sequined cock socks, seven sacks-a-slarging six men a laying, five 
gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree

On the twelth day of Xmas my true love gave to me
12-step redemption! Eleven crystal crack pipes ten butt plugs humming nine 
boys-a-dancing eight sequined cock socks, seven sacks-a-slarging six men 
a laying, five gold cock rings!
Four packs of Condoms three French whores three hits of X and a dildo in a 
pear tree